San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman was arrested early Sunday on suspicion of choking and restraining MTV reality show star Tila Tequila, police said. That’s according to CNN.com this week.
There are little details on the incident, but clearly an arrest was made. Is this another case of a man with enormous talent and potential unable to stop his physical self when emotions are involved? In many ways, it’s not so surprising for athletes. They spend decades of their lives being urged to use aggression to get what they want — in Merriman’s case, a Super Bowl ring — so why are we surprised that physical action is the go-to place when they get in a regressed state? I happen to know a man who was sentenced to a year of court-ordered domestic violence group therapy and he reported to me that it was like going to an NBA/NFL fan club meeting. There were many appearances by professional athletes in the court-ordered group.
So, what can parents and coaches of amateur and professional athletes do to help these young boys and men learn alternative ways to express emotions? At the very least, some skills in emotional communication should be taught alongside physical education. Already the NBA offers a course in sexuality to protect its rookies from arrest for rape or from an unwanted pregnancy. I think it’s time that these organizations step up and get these brave and talented men the emotional education and communication tools they need to keep themselves out of jail for domestic violence. Don’t you agree?