Archive for the ‘Crime Psychology’ Category

Three Women. Three Glasses of Wine. Three Stories of Betrayal.

Thursday, June 3rd, 2010

Being a Doctor of Psychology I can make academic sense of how successfully and without conscience many people lie. The best of them can go into a little mental compartment where they even believe their own lies as they flow out of their mouth.

I have seen Joran van der Sloot the suspect in the Natalee Holloway murder tell three separate stories about what happened in Aruba five years ago. In my opinion the only word of sordid truth he ever uttered was in Dutch when he referred to sweet Natalee as a “bitch.” The truth is that this young man has extreme anger toward women.

Lying to authorities to save your hide is one kind of deceit but what about the average person who lies to their closest intimates? Just last night, while sipping at a neighborhood wine bar, I heard three stories about men who lie to obtain sex, ego stroking, or even a woman’s trust. And as a woman (not a doctor, now) I have to say, what’s up with that?

In one story, my best friend’s longtime, on-again-off-again boyfriend was found to have fathered three children during the same years they whispered secrets between the sheets. Except he forgot to tell her that one secret — that his sperm, his time and his resources were going another direction.

In another story, a neighbor of mine was reeling from heartbreak after a broken engagement to an NFL football player (Read: He can afford bobbles.) In her loss and misery she thought she might console herself with a little recession era recycling so she marched her three carrot diamond ring to a jeweler, only to discover that a man she had once deeply trusted had given her a three carrot cubic zirconia.

While we continued to muse in disgust about how some men can feign intimacy and trustworthiness so well, the name of one of my old paramours came up. He’s been used as an example of a bad-boy in both my books (The Boyfriend Test and The Girlfriend Test) because this guy is the ultimate player. Over the course of our seventeen year “friendship” he has uttered the “L” word to me but he has also used my heart, my body and my money for his personal gain. He’s good, trust me. I have been out of his mesmerizing clutches for a few years now. Whew! But just a few weeks back I say him hiking with yet another beauty and shook my head to see that he’s still lying and juggling even at the age of, my God, could he be 53 by now? Anyway, my wine partners informed me that he had recently married his assistant. I laughed out loud, saying there is no way his marriage would have slowed down his appetite for frequent new sexual conquests. They assured me he is behaving as a loyal married man.

So I texted him a little “hello.”

And he quickly texted back. What he wrote were words that no married man should ever write to an old flame. My heart broke for his wife.

In the book, “101 Lies Men Tell Women, and Why Women Believe Them,” Dr. Dory Hollander claims that the root of all romantic lying is that women seek emotional connection and men mostly seek sex. The number one lie she sites? “I Love You.”

The saddest thing about my three stories of betrayal and the hundreds of stories in Dr. Hollander’s books is that so often we blame women for believing the lies. I was shocked to see the firestorm of criticism of Rielle Hunter, the mother of former presidential candidate John Edwards‘ fifth child. Somehow the media saw fit to place the bulk of the blame on her as a home wrecker. As the target of many, many lies issued from a male mouth, I can promise you that Mr. Edwards lied through his teeth to poor Miss. Hunter. First of all this slick rick wasn’t even playing in his own intellectual sandbox so getting her to believe his fabrications was probably a cake walk. I can just imagine his best promise to her, “Honey, you’re the one I love. My marriage is a sham to get me through this presidential campaign. Once I am president we can raise our baby in the White House.”  Trust me. His story ran along those lines.

The blame should never be on the recipient of a lie. Gullible people are innocent. Yes, I’ve removed the gender now, because some women lie as well as most men. But the culprit is the liar and his/her the lack of moral reasoning and inability to have compassion for others. The blame lies only with the deceitful person, not the one who trusted. What do you think?


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Posted in Crime Psychology, Emotions, Love, Marriage, Relationship Tools, Sexuality | 2 Comments »

Is Your Spouse Being Financially Unfaithful?

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

Does your spouse keep a separate safe deposit box? Do the family’s financial statements get mailed to an office address, not the home? Is he or she an ATM junkie? If so, there’s a chance your spouse could be stepping out on you with the family money. And this behavior is far more common with men than women.

It’s one thing to fear that your husband might stray with his heart and/or his body, but what most women don’t realize is that the risk of financial infidelity is far more dangerous and could lead to longer term consequences for women and their children.

“Most divorces are not impulsive decisions. One party or another checks out emotionally three to five years before they file for divorce,” says, Stacey Napp the CEO of Balance Point Funding, an investment firm that invests in women who have become financially disabled during a divorce proceeding. “Long before a man leaves, he begins to squirrel away assets so that he’ll hold the power in divorce court.” The behavior is more common with affluent husbands because, as a family’s net worth rises, couples tend to move into traditional gender roles, with the woman working less and handling more child rearing and household management chores. And if divorce happens these women are left unprotected. Since it is illegal in most states for a family attorney to work on a contingency (taking a percentage of the final settlement) the exit game becomes one where divorcing husbands strive to leave their wives with no assets to hire a good divorce lawyer — who may demand as much as $20,000 on the first visit.

“Divorce isn’t pretty, but it doesn’t have to be dirty,” says Napp, who founded her company after her own divorce and the financial infidelity she experienced that nearly cost her her entire lifestyle. According to Stacey Napp, there are six red flags that women should be on the alert for:

Is he being financially unfaithful?

1)      Your bank, brokerage or financial statements are sent to his office, and not to your  house
2)      You’re not the beneficiary of his life insurance policy
3)      Like clock work, the same amount of money is  being withdrawn from your joint account every month
4)      He has a separate safe deposit box
5)      Significant repeated cash withdrawals on your joint credit cards
6)      Does your husband own his own business and have his family as employees and/or partners in that business?  That alone isn’t a red flag, but if any of the above are also present- watch out!

So, if you do suspect trouble, is there anything you can do to stop the leakage? Yes, according to Napp, you have to act like your own forensic accountant and gather intelligence before he hides evidence from a real court. That may mean photocopying every document he ever brings home — including his entire wallet and briefcase. Since people stay in contact with their money, photocopy cell phone records, check frequent flyer miles, even the home telephone bill. Ever the financial sleuth, Napp says that calling fast food delivery restaurants in areas where phone calls have been made, can reveal what address goes with what number. And always, wives should request a once yearly free credit report from all three credit reporting bureaus. This report can contain information regarding financial institutions that he may have established relationships with that you were unaware of. It would also show any aliases and/or alternate social security numbers being used by your spouse.

With the enormous emotional pain that women experience during divorce, financial unfaithfulness adds another layer of injury. Injury that can have tragic consequences for children who might be yanked from school after losing tuition and women who many lose their home and community support system. Stacey suggests that women who are full-time mothers are especially vulnerable to this kind of infidelity.

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Posted in Crime Psychology, Divorce, Marriage | No Comments »

The Twilight Syndrome? Why Women Read Violent Books.

Tuesday, January 19th, 2010

twilight1In the middle of a divorce battle, Sheila Bellush, a mother of quadruplets, confided to her sister that if anything were to ever happen to her, she should look up true crime author Ann Rule to tell her story. Sure enough, soon after, Sheila was shot and killed by a man hired by her husband. Rule’s book about the crime, Every Breath You Take, has sold over a million copies and 86% of its reviews on Amazon.com are written by women readers.

This anecdote is used in a new study that reveals why books that evoke fear are popular with women. People might assume that men, being the more aggressive sex, would be most likely to find such gory topics interesting. But the reverse is true. The researchers found that what makes books about graphic crime appealing to women is a survival instinct — a desire to to learn about crime in order to prevent becoming a victim. The study, “Captured by True Crime: Why Women are Drawn to Tales of Rape, Murder, and Serial Killers” is published in Social, Psychological and Personality Science, and makes a connection with women’s fascination with crime and their internal fear. Despite the fact that women are statistically less likely than men to become a victim of a violent crime (with the exception of rape) they perceive themselves to be in more danger. Some researchers blame the media, that tends to award more coverage to violent crimes against women than those with male victims.

The problem with the practice of reading about crime, according to the researchers, is that it can become a vicious cycle. Women feel fear and read about crime in order to be better informed about ways to prevent or survive a crime, but they also become unknowingly exposed to more dangers! They meet more murderers, more unusual ways to bite the bullet, and their fear-actor goes up. Thus, the books become a fear-based cycle for women who are buying them to decrease their fears.

All this got me thinking about the obsession my daughter and her friends have with the Twilight series of books and movies. With Vampires around every corner, there is no shortage of danger and blood flow in those pages. And clearly there is much confusion for heroin Bella as to which man-boy-vampire can be trusted. I wonder if the principles that the researchers discovered about true crime novels also apply to this kind of romantic thriller.

In today’s times, love has become a dangerous game for teen girls. While most of the sexual mores — like the double standard — have been removed, women are still more at risk for pregnancy, an STD, or a broken heart. (Women’s oxytocin release during orgasm helps create a bond.) Could the Twilight vampires, a metaphor for dangerous love, be one way that young girls are trying to make sense of all this?

And if the researchers speculations are true, might this also become a vicious cycle? More stories about dangerous love means more exposure to ways that women can be hurt by men. Besides the Twilight series, there are enough literary clones to warrant a large display table at my local Barnes & Noble called “Dark Love.” Is this what are daughters fear today? Dark love?

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Posted in Crime Psychology, Domestic Violence, Emotions, Gender | No Comments »

Love & Letterman

Friday, October 9th, 2009

47_david_lettermanlarge_image-1We’ve all heard the saying that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. I don’t happen to agree with this pessimistic outlook. I have far more faith in humans to self regulate.

But it appears that David Letterman has a problem self regulating.

Anyone who owns a television knows that late night talk show host, David Letterman is currently embroiled in a, well, in a mess. First an extortion attempt against him, that spilled into public details of Dave’s complicated sex life, where it appears that for a few decades his primary hunting ground has been his workplace. Not good, Dave.

Is it illegal to have a workplace tryst? Absolutely not. People report that they fall in love at work all the time. Work is one of the best places to meet a potential spouse. Is it illegal to be having sex with two different people without their knowledge? Nope. Free country, after all. We are free to screw whomever we want (both definitions intended.) Is it illegal for bosses to screw subordinates? Now, here’s where it gets dicey Dave. If the boss creates an uncomfortable sexual environment or offers a quid pro quo for sex, then yes, the court calls this sexual harassment and it’s against the law. No one knows if boss-man Mr. Letterman, did any illegal thing and so far, no woman has complained. But just the fact that he is the boss and his sexual taste runs toward younger women whom he has some workplace power over, makes this not a rosy romantic picture.

It is indeed ironic that the external boundary that caused this flurry, was another man’s jealousy. It appears that one of Dave’s paramours was the girlfriend of an NBC news producer who is having hard economic times in this recession. And who isn’t? But this guy decided that David Letterman would be his prince with the glass shoe, or at least scared enough to write a check with plenty of zeros on it. He asked Dave for $2-million in exchange for keeping quiet about the now married Dave’s workplace sex life. That’s where the game stopped for these boys. Dave called in mommy to stop the mean bully. The rest is on your TV every night.

What’s happening here? Well, in simple caveman terms — an environment not far removed from NBC — Dave was the successful hunter who was bringing home the wooly mammoth to share with the tribe and that hunt gave him access to plenty of women who were hungry for their own kids food. Men have a strict pecking order and Dave, I mean the top dog hunter, could stay on top until he was really old and eventually a young buck would challenge him for all the women. Someone like A-Rod. You think it’s a coincidence that Letterman likes to make jokes about A-Rod? In the meantime, men in the pack still get some of Dave’s extra meat and extra women if they protect him. But that NBC news producer ran out of meat, was not such a great hunter himself, and even lost his babe to the big hunter. So he broke the male code, and challenged the top dog. And now the pack is still protecting Dave. The writers have rallied around him, writing jokes about other fallen sexual predators that amount to a, but-everybody-does-it defense.

And where are the women? Well, ex-girlfriend Merrill Markoe blogged that “Dave promised me many times that I was the only women he would ever cheat on.” A joke for sure, but the sub-text is this: Honey, if you’re going to eat the meat of a great hunter, you’d better be prepared to share. Ask any athlete’s wife about this rule.

What amazes me is that anyone is shocked. I mean, David Letterman is a famous guy. Most famous guys get lusty when they find power. (Pray that our president can suck on enough cigarettes to get through it without a scandle.) And, notice that none of Dave’s women have stepped forward with fingers pointed. Obviously he gave them enough meat that his short-term love was so worth it. I dunno. Somewhere in all this, my heart goes out to the sore loser who lost his money and his girl. Nice try for a last minutes save, buddy, but you lost. Take heart. It looks like you’ll get enough mystery-meat in jail.

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Posted in Celebrity Relationships, Crime Psychology | 3 Comments »

Is Your Date Crazy? Here’s How to Be A Psychological Detective.

Sunday, September 13th, 2009

www.ctspy.com/home_1.html

When you meet someone online, through a set up, or on the street, you might consider physical attraction first, but next comes psychological health. People look for romantic suitors who have the emotional ability to be a functional love partner.

But how can you tell?

First dates are like great theater and if  dating awards existed, some people would win the golden champagne bottle. On early dates men are like a peacocks showing their tail feathers and women behave like perfect Barbies. We bring to the dating table the person we really wish we were. That’s why a few people are actually addicted to short-term, serial relationships. They crave the mating dance but the reality of a truly intimate relationship is intolerable.

So if both parties are role playing, how does one determine what’s for real? Since dates don’t come with letters of reference from former lovers we have to rely on our own instincts to cut through the happy glow of the dating experience. There are few things you can listen for in the polite banter of a dating table, to give yourself big clues about what’s up for the future.

Before I tell you an important secret kept mostly by psychologists, I want to remind you that there are no perfect people. Having a healthy relationship involves learning about each other faults and foibles, and accepting what you can. Understanding each other’s tender spots is what intimacy is all about. We’re all crazy in some small way. But what if someone’s faults and foibles involve some trait that is soooo contrary to your values. What if the person is violent? A spendthrift or miser? A cruel gossip? Highly insecure? A pathological liar?

The answer is this: Your date will often tell you their biggest flaw on the very first date. You just have to know how to listen.

To explain this, I’m going to use Carl Jung’s theory of “The Shadow.” Jung believed that we all hold a piece of our personality away from our conscious awareness because it is shameful, ugly, and intolerable. However, if left unattended to, our shadow can direct our behavior. Part of Jungian Psychology is to bring light to the shadow so that as we can become whole, we learn to accept and control or shadow.

While our shadow is still buried away in our psyche, however, we look for it everywhere in the environment. We find objects (people) who appear to carry pieces of our shadow and we point fingers at them. “Look at how awful they are! I hate people like that!” In truth, Jungian’s believe that this judgmental behavior is a weak attempt to get rid of our shameful shadow. To direct it onto someone else. Christians use the metaphor of the fallen woman about to be stoned to drive home the same point… Remember this passage? “He who has not sinned, may cast the first stone.” That’s perfect Jungian thought.

Now back to your attractive date. Listen closely for his/her negative comments about others. I promise you they are giving you a clue about their own shadow!

Here are some examples:

• One man told a date that he had recently heard a conversation at a bar between a man and a woman and he was sure the man was lying to her about how much money he made. He thought it was funny that the woman was so gullible and was lapping it up. Six months later: The story teller, himself, started behaving very badly when his spending habits clearly did not match the income he had bragged about in the early stages of dating.

• One woman told her date that her pet peeve was insecure people. She said, “I’d rather have a murderer in my bedroom than an insecure person at my door.” Two weeks later, she cut off all communication with her date because he had given her a tiny piece of constructive criticism that she, herself, couldn’t tolerate.

• Then there’s the cruel gossip, who always has dirt on others and particularly slanders other cruel gossipers! I know one woman who always ends her hurtful gossip with the line. “I’ll pray for her.” Clearly this woman is praying for herself.

So, if you’ve gotten this far in my blog, you might be wondering about your own shadow. Here’s a little exercise for you. Take a piece of paper and at the top write the name of someone you loathe. Then really focus on this person and make a list of all their attributes on that paper. Be very connected to your hatred for this person. When you are done, erase their name at the top on the page, and write in your own name. Then take a big gulp of reality. This is the shadow you carry, ladies and gentlemen. May we all learn to shine light on it.

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Posted in Crime Psychology, Dating, Love, Relationship Tools | 4 Comments »

Please Forward to New Moms: From Princess to Queen — How New Mothers Psychologically Transform

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

Long before I had children, I had a love for all the world’s children and actively worked with a local children’s charity. During one of our heated planning meetings, I noticed that there were two camps within our board of directors — women who did not have children of their own and women who were seasoned Moms and Grandma’s. Sometimes the groups knocked heads about what was best for the disadvantaged children to whom we administered good will, and inevitably someone from the latter camp would fire off the hurtful missive, “You girls don’t get it. You don’t have kids of your own!”

Back then, I disagreed. But now as I look at all the things my eleven year old and six year old have taught me, I finally get it. I do know a few things that child-free women can’t possibly know. So, what was it that I didn’t “get?” And how could I explain to new mothers that they are about to transform into another animal entirely?

Let’s start with your body. Hormones rule, here. If you think you’re a bit “off” while pregnant and hope that you will return to normal after you give birth, think again. You have been wired to nurture now and the explosion of oxytocin in postpartum life changes the way you think and behave. You’ll be amazed at how well you can cope without sleep. You’ll be confused about how to balance work and motherhood, for your body is programmed by millions of years of evolution to sit under a tree and nurse for a long, long while. You might find giant bursts of creativity that were untapped before. And, you may even have to struggle with your own internalized whore/madonna syndrome, as you feel the unfair pressure to return to your sexy self when you feel far more like a grumpy dairy cow.

For some, these struggles combine with a biological predisposition and morph into postpartum depression. Each year more than 800,000 women suffer from postpartum depression. That’s close to 1 in five, ladies. And the symptoms are so varied that they can be missed. Let’s see, how many new mothers dismiss symptoms like, a change in walking pace, low self-esteem, and bad memory? Seems like normal new mother behavior to me, yet these symptoms can be part of a bigger diagnosis. Check out the PPD symptom list below, and add to it the possibility for anxiety related symptoms:

• Depressed mood-tearfulness, hopelessness, and feeling empty inside, with or without severe anxiety.
• Loss of pleasure in either all or almost all of your daily activities.
• Appetite and weight change-usually a drop in appetite and weight, but sometimes the opposite.
• Sleep problems-usually trouble with sleeping, even when your baby is sleeping.
• Noticeable change in how you walk and talk-usually restlessness, but sometimes sluggishness.
• Extreme fatigue or loss of energy.
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, with no reasonable cause.
• Difficulty concentrating and making decisions.
• Thoughts about death or suicide. Some women with PPD have fleeting, frightening thoughts of harming their babies: these thoughts tend to be fearful thoughts, rather than urges to harm.

If this list feels a little familiar to you, I urge you to seek professional help. Despite the baby boom that you see portrayed in celebrity magazines, our culture is still anti-motherhood and PPD symptoms can be brought on by an unsupportive environment. Your body wants to lay low even though there are bills to pay and a marriage to attend to. Seek a therapist who really understands postpartum depression.

Now, once you have your meds, or your support, or your non-chemical remedy, let’s talk about your new place in the world. And let’s start with your village. Don’t freak out that your circle of friends may change. Your old child-free friends can take only so much baby talk and can offer little in the way of advice, so you’ll find yourself gravitating toward the Moms you meet in your new baby groups. And, I highly advise that you join some groups, whether it’s baby-and-me yoga, a breast-feeding support group, or a baby music class. Getting out of the house and co-mingling with other new moms will reduce your chances of depression and help you gain a whole lot of insight about motherhood. You will find your voice as a parent through comparing and contrasting yourself to other mothers.

Now onto your political self. New mothers see the world in a kind of technicolor as they begin to view life through the eyes of their children. You’ll notice things that you never noticed before, like bad parenting, highly sexualized advertising, public swearing, expensive healthcare, and streets without stroller-ready sidewalks. And, hopefully also you’ll find yourself marching out to right the world. Mothers are a political force to be reckoned with. Welcome to our club. And you don’t even have to leave your sleeping baby to make a difference. There are more than 900 Mom community web sites and countless other online communities that fight causes. By becoming involved you will become empowered as your begin to take the throne as the powerhouse of your home.

Speaking of power, I think that’s the biggest transformation that a new mother makes — from your lover’s hotty princess to a fully developed Queen. Mothers are the Queen of their world. There’s a saying in the south that sums up the power of motherhood, “When Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” You are now the emotional lightning rod and the gentle soothing wind to every other person in your nest. And this power can bring feelings of self-esteem unmatched by any paycheck. Mothers are the life-force of a household, providing food, a comfortable shelter, and, when necessary, a gentle admonishing or a supportive cheer. Whether you work outside the home, from home, or on your home, you are the most valued member of the team.

You have proven yourself. You have the capacity to create human life within your womb and nurture it to greatness in your nest. And this is the thing child-free women will never know. The secret confidence that comes from knowing you did something so magical. You created life and forever more you will nurture life. Mothers are almost God-like, in that way. And when you carry that force out into the world you will be awed by the power you have to affect change everywhere. You are now a mother in the world. All hail before you.

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Posted in Crime Psychology, Infant Attachment, Love, Parenting | 1 Comment »

Your Unconscious — Look whose driving your car!

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

10424_152186811833_115788661833_3449596_98040_aHow many times have you asked yourself, “Why did I do that?” I should have learned that doesn’t work.

I have a favorite metaphor to explain how unconscious processes drive our behavior. Imagine that you have grown up, away from your troubled childhood, and have created your dream adult life. You are in the back of a limo. You have cash. And you look great. The only problem is the limo driver. You can’t see his/her face and no matter how often you order them to take you to the finest restaurant and most beautiful mansion, that darn driver keeps turning that car around and going back to some dirty bird restaurant you ate at as a kid. And rather than taking you to a mansion, your driver keeps pulling up to the house you grew up in. Urrgh!!!

Whether you are a layperson, like most screen writers, and use the term “sub”-conscious, or have training in Psychology and like to look smart by saying, “un”-conscious, the meaning is the same. We all have early life feelings that are out of our awareness, yet drive most of our conscious life.

So, are we a slave to our unconscious, or can we break the shackles of early life programming and think, feel, and behave as an adult? The answer is yes, but not without help. If we’re super lucky, we have a love relationship that both contains us and challenges us to grow. The rest of us pay for therapists to do that.

Sigmund Freud may have been a victim of his Victorian era, but he was a genius when it came to understanding the unconscious. He believed that by helping the unconscious become conscious, people can be relieved from psychic pain and bad behaviors. He also believed that dreams are the “royal road to the unconscious” in that they contain “pre-conscious” material. Not that dreams are literal. But that dreams are feelings with pictures. My advice: If you are choosing a therapist, ask them if they do dream therapy. There is plenty of material in the nocturnal theater of our minds.

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Posted in Crime Psychology, Domestic Violence, Relationship Tools | No Comments »

Jaycee’s Abductor. Is Rape Natural?

Friday, August 28th, 2009

5532_144390991833_115788661833_3339069_5427959_aThe registered sex offender who abducted Jaycee Lee Dugard and kept her captive for eighteen years had a prior record of rape. According to some experts, a rapist “gene” is something that may have helped evolution, that is, if men could procreate with both willing and unwilling women, it indicated fitness. And in doing so, they would also be passing on the gene that provided a penchant for forced sex.

This theory was expounded In a 2000 book co-authored by biologist Randy Thornhill, called “A Natural History of Rape: Biological Bases of Sexual Coercion.” But this year, in a Newsweek article, the debunking of the notion began. According to Newsweek’s Sharon Begley, Anthropologist, Kim Hill at Arizona State University, had a hunch that sloppy projections had been made about the fitness of rape. Although Anthropologists still study a fewhunter/gatherer societies today, few have ever seen a rape. That doesn’t mean the gene wasn’t selected for increased reproduction though.

Hill and some colleagues decided to do a calculation using an example of the Aché, a traditional hunter/gatherer tribe living in Paraguay. Using an example of a 25-year-old Aché, they mathematically projected how rape would affect the evolutionary journey of one male. They basically calculated a rapist’s costs and benefits and the likelihood that his genes would survive. They were also generous with their calculations — assuming that the subject would only rape women of child-bearing age, when in actuality, women of all ages are raped. The calculations included a demerit point system — the man would lose fitness points for things like getting killed by a rape victim’s relative, having the child abandoned by the rape victim, the likelihood that conception would happen at all based on a woman’s reproductive cycle, and even if being a rapist in a small town would affect the likelihood that others would share their food.

And…. drum roll please…. the final math, from Begley’s June, 2009, Newsweek article:

“Rape increases a man’s evolutionary fitness based on the chance that a rape victim is fertile (15 percent), that she will conceive (a 7 percent chance), that she will not miscarry (90 percent) and that she will not let the baby die even though it is the child of rape (90 percent). Hill then ran the numbers on the reproductive costs and benefits of rape. It wasn’t even close: the cost exceeds the benefit by a factor of 10. ‘That makes the likelihood that rape is an evolved adaptation extremely low,’ says Hill. ‘It just wouldn’t have made sense for men in the Pleistocene to use rape as a reproductive strategy, so the argument that it’s preprogrammed into us doesn’t hold up.’ ”

Yep, from the mouths of scientists — if you are a rapist, you can’t blame your genes fellas. It’s your own damn fault. Well, actually it’s probably the fault of some receptive biology mixed with a bad childhood. But it’s your own damn fault if you fail to seek help.

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Posted in Crime Psychology, Domestic Violence, Sexuality | No Comments »