Category Archives: For Parents

Dr. Wendy Walsh Named Celebrity Spokesperson of The National Domestic Violence Hotline

ndvh_bubbleFor Immediate Release: Celebrities Gather to End Domestic Violence

OJ Simpson Prosecutor Marcia Clark, Academy Award Winner Marcia Gay Harden and The National Domestic Violence Hotline CEO, Katie Ray Jones, among women speaking at the “Women of Influence, Cocktail and Conversation” event in Santa Monica this Thursday, Nov.6th. At the event Dr. Wendy Walsh will be named celebrity spokesperson for The Hotline. A panel discussion will look at DV from OJ Simpson, to Chris Brown, to Ray Rice and the NFL’s recent donation to The Hotline.

Tickets and Media Inquires: Cameka Crawford, NDVH CCO, ccrawford@ndvh.org 

WHAT: Los Angeles, Women of Influence Cocktails and Conversation, (Party and panel discussion)

WHEN: Thursday, November 6th, 7:00 pm

WHERE: KidsInTheHouse.com, 1453 14th Street, Santa Monica, CA, 90404

WHO:   Dr. Wendy Walsh, America’s Relationship Expert, Katie Ray-Jones, CEO, The National Domestic Violence Hotline, Marcia Clark, Author and former OJ Simpson Prosecutor, Shannon Humphrey, President, LA Black Women’s Lawyer Association, Marcia Gay Harden, Activist and Academy Award Winning Actress, Kandee Lewis, Executive Director of the Positive Results Corporation, Leanna Greene, CEO, KidsInTheHouse.com and many more.

SPONSORS: Retrouvé Luxury Skin Care, Lorimar Vineyard and Winery, Adam Corolla’s Mangria, KidsInTheHouse.com, and Lawrence Adamo, Summit Financial.

TICKETS AND MEDIA INQUIRIES: Cameka Crawford, CCO, The National Domestic Violence Hotline ccrawford@ndvh.org

 

 

 

Ray Rice Appealing Suspension. #WhyHeHits.

1342481785_7079_Ray-Rice_01-300x286ESPN reports today that Ray Rice is appealing his suspension from the Baltimore Ravens for knocking his fiancé unconscious, under the grounds that “he was punished twice for the same offense.” Whatever the NFL decides, twenty years after the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson and the ensuing OJ Simpson trial, we, as a culture are still confused about intimate partner violence.

A twitter hashtag flood called #WhyIStayed has victims desperately attempting to describe the invisible shackles that bind them into a cycle of love and violence. Others are firing back with tweets that this is the wrong conversation and the hashtag #WhyHeHits has emerged. Still others are taking the eye-for-an-eye argument, reminding us that women hit too. (Surely a 200 pound man has the ability to walk away. When a woman lies on the floor unconscious, she can’t retreat.) But all these conversations are the wrong ones.

If one in four American women will become victims of intimate partner violence in their life time, then one in four men are potential offenders. I remind you, these are not crazed psychopaths living on the street. These are our brothers, and fathers, and uncles, and boyfriends, and husbands. They are not monsters. In fact, to outsiders they may appear to be good boyfriends and good husbands. And too many women who had a father who abandoned them as a child, think long and hard before tearing a father from the lives of their children. But I am digressing here, into that #WhySheStays conversation.

The much bigger question for our society as a whole is, what are we doing wrong? How is it that twenty-five per cent of our boys are being raised to strike instead of negotiate? How is it that the only tool available to many men in moments of deep emotional frustration, is the fist? And, trust me, there is no environment more frustrating than our personal romantic relationships. It’s a hallmark of intimacy — we save the most sadistic parts of our personality for those we love the most. If our lover is still present after the infant inside emerges to take a tantrum, then we know it is real love. But violence is more than a tantrum. It is a the act of shutting down a perceived attack that hurts more than words. Too many men are not taught to manage their feelings. Boys are taught that crying is weak. Sharing prickly feelings like fear and shame are unmanly. And, because women excel at verbal communication, men may feel ill-equipped in comparison, when trying to express their feelings.

And there’s another problem. We teach boys to hit. When a parent uses corporal punishment, they are assaulting a tiny body full of love and trust and wonder. Some of my social media followers are quick to point out that not all children who were hit grow up to be hitters. While I can’t say that all abused boys grow up to be abusers, we know that abuse has devastating effects on the psyches of all. Let’s start a new hashtag today #StopHittingBoys. It’s time we stop raising domestic violence offenders. And we owe it to our boys (and girls) to help them make sense of their emotions.

FOR PARENTS: Becoming Woman – Teaching Daughters About Sexuality

mixed race confident teens on student vacationGirls are taught a total of two things about their sexuality: DO and DON’T. Today, sex education for females starts and stops in politics. With educators, mentors and sometimes parents silent about sexuality, young women turn to their friends, the media, or the internet for information on their changing bodies and minds.

This week on Wine with Dr. Wendy, we will be continuing the intriguing conversation from last week about teaching sexuality to our children, except this week we’re doing it with a focus on girls. Tune this Wednesday at 8:00 pm PT to see how you can talk to your daughters about sex. Joining Dr. Wendy will be Hangout producer Laura Hampikian, Amy Lang from Birds + Bees + Kids, and freelance writer and blogger on Wealthy Single Mommy, Emma Johnson.

This Hangout is Q&A enabled, which means that you can ask questions to the guests and I before the Hangout and even LIVE during the Broadcast.

If you have a Google+ page, you can participate in the event here. Don’t have Google+? Watch the broadcast from the steam below!

FOR PARENTS: Be a Man- Teaching Boys about Sexuality

SneakersBoys will be boys. Young men are simple: they’re motivated by sex– exclusively. They would rather not entangle themselves in the emotional aspects of a relationship. We’re taught that these are facts of nature. Men evolved this way, and these are biological facts. But can we truly attribute our player culture to nature, or is it a flaw in how we nurture?

This Wednesday at 8:00 pm PT, tune in for Wine with Dr. Wendy as we discuss teaching boys about their sexuality. Joining Dr. Wendy will be Hangout producer Laura Hampikian, therapist, evaluator, speaker, and author of Challenging Casanova, Dr. Andrew Smiler, and Associate Professor of Sociology at Ithaca College and author of numerous publications, Rebecca Plante.

This Hangout is Q&A enabled, which means that you can ask questions to the guests and I before the Hangout and even LIVE during the Broadcast.

If you have a Google+ page, you can participate in the event here. Don’t have Google+? Watch the broadcast from the steam below!

DR. WENDY WALSH IS AVAILABLE FOR TELEPHONE RELATIONSHIP COACHING. TO SCHEDULE, PLEASE CLICK HERE AND COMPLETE THE BOX ON THE LEFT. SHE’LL PERSONALLY RESPOND.

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WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT LOVE AND SEX? GET 50% OF MY ONLINE WORKSHOP “THE PSYCHOLOGY OF HUMAN MATING” USE PROMO CODE “LOVE 50” CLICK HERE

 

 

Mindfulness and Your Relationships

stockvault-man-in-lotus-pose121427It is Spring! As the weather warms and the sunny days begin to stretch longer, we are filled with optimism. This is our chance to have a rebirth or new beginning. In our relationships, single people begin to shed their winter clothes and winter pounds and begin their search for a mate. Couples clean out their closets and in the flurry of spring cleaning there is opportunity to change negative patterns of relating.

I encourage you to use the Springtime for your own personal growth. Lately, I have been practicing mindful meditation.  It’s the newest lifestyle trend taking the world, not by storm, but by a single, focussed breath: Mindfulness. Living in the moment, breathing with an effortless flow and adorning for sensuous feeling is no longer a short-lived bonus for spa goers. It is a trending way of life.

Mindfulness is growing in popularity because it is a brain training technique with a host of scientifically proven benefits. The practice of non-judgmental focused breathing and awareness of the present has been shown to reduce stress, improve athletic performance, boost creativity, improve immune functioning, ease chronic pain, lower blood pressure, and even help patients cope with cancer and reduce the risk of heart disease.

But Mindfulness’s proven benefits to mood are equally as exciting. Mindful people are happier, more empathetic, and more confident. People who meditate regularly have higher self-esteem and can comfortably accept their own weaknesses. Stopping to adjust your awareness on the here and now makes people less reactive and impulsive, behaviors that can fuel depression, eating disorders, and attention deficit issues. The benefits to relationships are powerful. Mindful people argue less with their lovers are less likely to feel attacked and feel more compassion. As a result, daily mediation can lead to happier, more satisfied love relationships.

Mindfulness is the opposite of attention deficit injected by technology and  multi-tasking. Mindfulness is about having an abundance of attention. It is pure focus without thought. Like an athlete in her zone, mindfulness is a calm attention to everything present: breathing, body awareness, sights, sounds, feelings, and the energy of all life.

Techniques of Mindfulness Training:

  1. Savoring the present experience (sight, smell, touch)
  2. Breathing -awareness of your breath in a gentle flow.
  3. Knowing that you don’t know.
  4. Accepting all feelings without judgement
  5. Seeing the blurred line between you and all life.