FOR MEN: What a MILF Wants

rbk-help-moms-0612-mdnReprinted from askmen.com

 

When I first heard the term MILF (mom I’d like to f*ck), I was as appalled as I was excited. Excited because motherhood was clearly getting a vital makeover and appalled because I felt the term was yet another way to reduce women to a sex object.

But when my Facebook followers began to dub me “Dr. MILF,” I looked around at my day (I have two kids and a mortgage) filled with runny noses, homework tantrums and endless carpools, and decided that even this limited compliment glamorized my life a bit.

After all, single mothers are a valuable demographic to men looking for a life partner. We are 14-million strong. But the problem with some men who date MILFs is they forget the most important thing: A good MILF is a mother first and foremost. This means you need to change your game. Here’s how.

1. Patience is the name of the game

The one thing a MILF is in short supply of is time. Between working and raising kids, her social calendar is small and a tad inked in. So be patient. Book ahead. And don’t expect her to be available three nights a week.

2. Become a Mr. Fix-It

We all know that every man loves to solve problems. And dad-less homes usually have a lot of tiny problems. You may not be a handyman (and if you are, you’ll be a shoe-in), but I bet you can move some furniture around for her, download a new program for her computer or improve on her audio/visual system. Some MILFs can do these things themselves, but it’s so much fun to watch a guy do it.

3. Understand if she is protective of her kids

Here’s a disturbing statistic: When children live in a home with a non-biologically-related adult male (mommy’s boyfriend), they are 11 times more likely to experience sexual, physical or emotional abuse. Here’s another one: A common way that pedophiles gain access to victims is to date their mother. A good, responsible mother will be aware of the dangers and may be overly vigilant about exposing you to them at the beginning.

4. MILFs have less disposable income

Unless Donald Trump is her baby daddy, you can count on the fact that a MILF is struggling somewhat. Even if she has a good job, many mothers who thought they burst through the glass ceiling are surprised to slam into the “maternal wall,” a subtle system of discrimination against mothers in the workforce that reduces their chances for promotion and salary bumps. That means she probably can’t split the cost of that zip-lining vacation in Costa Rica. But if you stay long enough to get invited home for dinner, she’ll eventually be grilling you a good steak and scooping a mean mac ‘n cheese.

5. Take care of your own kids

If you are a father yourself, there is no better way to get a MILF’s juices flowing than to be a seriously involved father. Women know the difference between a man who just pays child support and a man who is a loving person. A MILF is a wise woman. Her fabulous children also came with a lot of relationship heartache that she does not want to relive. Be good to your first family, and she’ll feel reassured.

6. Pay her babysitter

Every time a woman with small children walks out her door, it costs her $10-15 an hour. It’s bad enough that she has to go to work saddled with this handicap, but it’s also a deterrent for dating. If you want her schedule to open up more, increase her chances for freedom by paying her sitter.

Smart men know that if they are in the market for a grown-up woman who is mature, responsible and commitment-oriented, a single mother is a sure bet. And watching how she cares for and shapes her kids’ behavior is a secret window into how she’ll treat you down the road. It’s a big responsibility to date a MILF. But the payback is a solid woman who can protect your back like a mother bear. Oh, and, yes, there’s that “F” part.

 

2 thoughts on “FOR MEN: What a MILF Wants

  1. I am a recently divorced mother of two, in my early 30’s. I’ve never thought of myself as a MILF until right now. Your list above is so accurate! I am new to the dating game after 12 years and what I run into so often are A) Men who don’t understand how limited my time is. I can make time for the right man but they get frustrated when asking for a date and I have to schedule them in 2 weeks out. B) Men who claim to be Daddy’s yet haven’t seen their child(ren) in 6 months to a year. C) Men that “can’t wait to meet” my children. While it’s important that a new man in my life and my children would get along well, I am definitely not rushing to introduce them. I have to know and trust you before you’ll ever get close to them.

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